Everything Happens for a Reason II: Stupid Cupid
by Mahna Mahna
Summary: What happens when Daria realizes what Cupid has done for her?
1. Prelude

**Everything Happens for a Reason II: **_"Stupid Cupid"_

(working title)

* * *

Prelude

St. Patrick's Day and Cupid led Daria and Jane to the back of the Holiday Island Good Time Chinese Restaurant. It was time to say goodbye.  
  
"I thank you kindly," said St. Patrick's Day gratefully. "You've saved the holidays."  
  
"All in a day's work," said Daria.  
  
"And if there's anything I can do for you…once you've reached the legal drinking age, that is…let me know." He winked.  
  
Daria highly doubted she would ever call for his help, but maybe there was something they could do for her. "What about my parents? Could you at least recommend a doctor?"  
  
"No need, dude. They'll be back to normal by the time you get home," Cupid assured her.  
  
"Good. One little sister is enough," Daria sighed.  
  
"And if there's anything I can do for you---"  
  
"Hey, you keep that gun of yours away from me." She backed away.  
  
"Aw, come on, Daria," teased Jane. "You could use a good 'zap'."  
  
"Yeah, I play matchmaker for everybody, and that includes you," said Cupid.  
  
"He's right, lassie," said Pat. "Nearly everyone is helped by Cupid at some point."  
  
"And if everyone jumped off a building, should I do it too?" Daria said dryly.  
  
"Depends on how soft the pile of bodies underneath it is," said Jane. "Anyway, St. Val, feel free to mess with my love life. You'll probably do a better job than I'm doing now, anyway."  
  
"Thanks, Jane. And please, call me Cupid." He grinned. "How about you, Daria?"  
  
"Fine, go ahead," said Daria, shaking her head. She was getting sick of talking about it, and figured that the sooner she ended the argument, the sooner she'd wake up from this crazy dream. "Hit me with your best shot."  
  
"Can do," Cupid said smiling.  
  
"We'd better go, ladies," said St. Patrick's Day. "Class starts in about 12 minutes. Do you need any help getting back?"  
  
"Nah, we know the way. Through the hole in the back of the Chinese place, into the interdimensional wormhole and out the other end…. We get it," said Jane.  
  
"Kay, then. Good luck, dudettes! See you soon!" Cupid waved as he and Pat walked away.  
  
"I'd better wake up soon," Daria told Jane, as the both of them prepared to crawl through the wormhole. "I'm sick of this."  
  
"Yeah," Jane said. "I mean, this has been interesting and all, but I'd like to get back to my dreams about Tom Cruise, thank you very much."  
  
"Mm, didn't need to know that."  
  
"Hey, you're just DreamDaria. Why should I care what you think?"  
  
"Actually, I think I'm the one dreaming here."  
  
"Sure you are. Tell you what, can we discuss this after we get home? I kinda want to go back through the rabbit hole and leave Wonderland while we still can."  
  
"Sounds good to me. And Jane?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Never, ever let me eat Chinese food out of your fridge again."  
  
"Got it." 


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Five years later, Daria sat on her overstuffed recliner in her apartment as Tom sat cross-legged nearby on the floor. Both silently flipped through various wedding catalogues and magazines.

"What about _puce _centerpieces?" Tom asked with his eyebrows furrowed.

Daria kept her eyes on her catalogue. "What's 'puce'?" she said distractedly.

"I was hoping _you_ knew." He flipped the page. "Oh, wait, here's a picture."

"Mm."

He examined the picture, then shrugged. "That's not bad. What do you think?" He held up the magazine so she could see.

"Mm," she said, still not looking up.

Tom raised an eyebrow. "Or we could skip the centerpieces and use the extra money to replace the band we hired with an all-girl mouth-harp and kazoo revue."

"Mm."

Tom sighed and waved a hand in front of her face, startling her into paying attention. "I didn't think it was possible, but I think you're more tired of this than I am," he said.

She shook her head. "I'm sorry. I was just…thinking." Before he could ask her what she was thinking about, she said, "Tired' is right, though. What time is it, anyway?"

Tom lifted his right sleeve up to check his watch. "12:47." He cursed under his breath. "I'd better get back. I've got a class at 8:00 tomorrow."

Both he and Daria got up and walked to the door. "Too bad we had to spend all night planning the wedding," Daria said.

Tom shrugged. "Yeah, but it's better than having your sister do the whole thing by herself." A month after they got engaged, Quinn had insisted that she help plan the wedding. If they didn't give her an idea of what they wanted, she'd just go with her own tastes.

"As God as my witness," said Daria, "I will never let my bridesmaids wear pink taffeta."

"That's the spirit," he said opening the door. He leaned in and gave her a long kiss goodbye. "See you tomorrow?"

"See you tomorrow."

As she shut the door behind him, she couldn't help but let out a smile, which soon faded as she felt her heart drop into her stomach. Everything with Tom was going so well, but a recent experience at her commitment ceremony had filled her with doubt about her relationship. Sure, she had written off her Holiday Island adventure as a dream before, but she had a sinking feeling that maybe it wasn't all a fantasy. And if it wasn't a fantasy, neither was Cupid's promise that he would set her up with someone.

Self-consciously, she glanced down at her oversized sweater and shapeless pants. 'Yep, you'd need a shot with the love gun before you looked twice…' She shook her head, trying to snap herself out of her funk. 'I've got to do something….talk to someone.'

She made her way into the kitchen, grabbing the phone on the nearby wall. She hit the second speed dial number and waited for an answer.

After three rings, the call was picked up. "Yo. Lane residence."

"Hi Jane," said Daria. "I didn't wake you, did I?"

"Are you kidding? It's not even 1:00 yet."

"That's what I thought." Daria paced across the kitchen floor. "Listen, can I come over? We need to talk about something."

"Sure thing. About what?"

She twirled the phone cord around her finger. "Just…a couple of old friends of ours."

"We had other friends?"

"Sort of. Jane, I think it's time we talked about Holiday Island again."


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Daria let out a tired sigh as she rang the doorbell to Jane's apartment. Daria had originally lived there with her for over two years, but since she would be married soon, she and Tom decided to find a place of their own. He'd move in with her after the wedding, and Jane would find another roommate soon, but until then, the two girls lived alone.

Jane didn't take long to open the door. "Yo."

"Hi," Daria said as she stepped inside. She made her way into the living room area, carefully avoiding random junk that lay on the floor. "Somebody needs a cleaning lady."

"Mm, can't find anybody that works as cheaply as you did."

"I did it for free."

"Exactly. Now, enough with the small talk," Jane said, waving her hand as an indication that Daria should sit. "What's with this Holiday Island business? I thought we settled this a long time ago."

Daria sat down on the paint-stained couch. "I know, but…. how sure are we that it was a dream?"

"Very sure. You remember what that book said. When people go through the same situations in real life, they can have similar dreams. So, you, me, and Trent accidentally ate some expired Chinese food and fell asleep watching _Behind the Music _and a documentary on holiday origins and presto! Dreams about an all-Holiday rock band from a hole in the Chinese place."

"I know, I know." Daria looked down.

"_And_ there's the fact that the dream spanned at least five days while we only slept for about eight hours."

"Yes, I know," Daria said, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. "Every piece of logic points to the fact that it was just a fantasy but…it was so real!"

Jane bit her lip. "Well, yeah, but still."

"Look, there's something I haven't told you yet. Remember at my commitment ceremony how Trent sang that Barry White song?"

"Unfortunately, yes. Oh, that was horrible." She winced as she remembered the awful rendition.

"Do you also remember how Cupid liked to do Barry White impersonations?" Jane was silent. "Trent said the person who requested the song was called 'Eros', and Jane, I could've sworn that I saw him."

She stood with her eyes wide. "That doesn't necessarily mean anything," she said, trying to convince herself more than she was trying to convince Daria.

"Well, think about this. Right before the 'dream' ended, Cupid said he'd help with our love lives because we helped him. Guess who showed up three months later?"

She thought for a moment, until she realized with surprise….."Tom." She shook her head. "Is that why you're getting so worked up about this?"

Daria gave her a long, sad look. "Jane, I don't want to marry a thank you present."

Jane frowned and said concernedly, "Aw, come on, Daria. Don't be like that. Those are just coincidences. It wasn't real."

"But I have a feeling in my gut that they _aren't_ coincidences!" Daria insisted. "And if they aren't, then he doesn't really…." she trailed off, getting more and more depressed.

"Well.." Jane swallowed. "What if we went down to the Chinese restaurant? If you saw there was no hole there, would you stop with this whole Cupid thing?"

Daria looked interested in the idea. "Yeah, I guess."

"Terrific. Let's go."

"Now?" Daria looked at the clock on the wall. "It's almost 1:30."

"Well, it's obvious that you're just going to dwell on it unless we do something now." She put her hands on her hips.

"Well, we can't go to Lawndale now, so what can we do?"

"I don't know." Jane thought a minute. "Wait…I--- no, that's stupid."

"No, wait, what was your idea?"

"Forget it. It probably wouldn't work, and we'd just end up looking dumb."

"Jane, I promise: I'm up to trying anything."

"Anything?"

"Anything. What do you suggest?"

"Well…" Jane rubbed her chin in thought. "Obviously, if Cupid does exist, he's got magical powers, right?"

Daria thought back to her experiences with him. "I guess."

"So maybe he could appear to us at a moment's notice!"

Daria looked doubtful. "Possibly. How would we get him to come here, though?"

"Well, here's the tricky part. He must have a way of knowing things about us, or else why would he and St. Patrick's Day ask you to help them with their problem?"

"So, you're saying he's spying on us?"

"No, but maybe he's got some omniscient powers or something…. I dunno. See, I _told_ you it was stupid."

"No, no. Go on. I'm listening."

Jane sighed. "Ok. So, I'm thinking if we can get his attention, he could come over here. So, if he showed up, then you'd know it obviously would know it wasn't a dream."

"And if he _didn't_ show up, then he either doesn't exist, or we'd have to make a trip later to the Chinese place."

"Right."

"So, how are we supposed to get his attention?"

"Actually…" She smiled uncomfortably. "…I do have this one idea." She cleared her throat and began to sing. "_Stupid Cupid you're a real mean guy. I'd like to clip your wings so you can't fly."_

"Oh, please, no. No singing." Daria buried her head in her hands.

"You have a better idea?"

"Yes, how about yelling 'Hey Cupid!'?"

"Nah, we got to annoy him to make him come fast."

"Well, that would be the way to do it." She wrinkled her nose at Jane's poor singing skills.

"Oh, shut up and join in. _I am in love an it's a crying shame, and I know that you're the one to blame. Hey, hey, set me free."_

Reluctantly, Daria joined her. "_Stupid Cupid, stop picking on me."_

__  
_"You mixed me up for good right from the very start. Hey go play Robin Hood with somebody else's heart."_

"Oh shut _up_," cried a voice from the other side of the room. "I _hate_ that song!"

The two girls turned around to face the source of the voice and stared in shock.

"You rang?" Cupid said, grimacing.


End file.
